Two Opposing Forces
817 words by OOtubusin
Beep! Beep! Beep! The buzzing meant it was eight, which also meant it was time for me to wake up for church. But all I needed was ten more minutes of sleep, so I hit the snooze button and rolled back over and closed my eyes.
“Owo, get up now so we can get to church on time,” yelled my mom, while she was continued beating heavily upon my door.
I looked at the clock only to find out that it was three minutes past eight. All I needed was a few more minutes of sleep and everything would be fine.
“I’m already up,” I yelled. But of course, my mom already knew I was lying because she could still hear the sleep in my voice. But what did I care? I was tired!
“Alright, if you make us late for church, you’ll be grounded for a week!”
But I didn’t care; I needed some sleep!
A few minutes later the alarm clock went off again. After realizing I was not going to get any sleep, I got up and put on the dress my mother had laid out for me. It was red with white polka dots. Yuck!
That was always the scene at my house on Sundays. I liked children’s church, but I hated waking up to go and listen to the same sermon I had heard the previous year. I hated first Sundays because we went to church twice: once in the morning and once in the evening to take communion. I also hated first Sundays because all the kids would have to go to the “big” church, which was excruciatingly boring, because it was “family” Sunday. But, most of all, I hated church because of the fact that I had to wear a dress. And I was no girly-girl. I would have preferred to wear basketball shorts over a dress any day!
As I entered middle school, I quickly traded in my basketball shorts for skirts and dresses. It was either dress like a boy and get talked about or dress like a girl and fit in. But, somehow, a passion for church did not come along with my skirts and dresses. I still hated church!
I knew a lot about Jesus and read my Bible (otherwise known as “Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth”) everyday because I was told that people get into heaven by reading their Bible and saying their prayers. I often felt that nobody could tell me anything I did not know about Jesus. But little did I know that my faith would soon be tested.
During the third week of school in my science class, my teacher, Mrs. Cuellar, taught all the different evolutionary theories. I quickly dismissed some of those theories and the others I questioned. Immediately, I felt myself being torn away from God. Were we created or did we truly evolve from apes through gradual mutations? I was confused. And I quickly saw myself grasping for answers. All my life I was told God created man in his image before he created all other creatures, but now I was being told I had evolved from an ape that was also a product of evolution. Was I a child of God or was God truly the biggest myth kept alive by humans all over the world?
As I continued with school, I always questioned whether or not God existed. And even though I attended bible study and church, I still was not sure if he was real. But I had to credit my successful academic endeavors to someone because, after all, I had graduated number two in my class and received full tuition to attend Xavier University of Louisiana to study pharmacy.
While online reading my college curriculum, I realized that I would be required to take six hours of theology. I decided I would take Intro to Biblical Studies. I did not know what to expect, but I figured this would be the perfect time for me to build my faith and grow spiritually. After asking around, I learned that theology would be difficult and time consuming. Upon hearing this news, I got really nervous. But after the first class, I was relieved.
Besides the fact that we had a real lecture the first day of class, everything else was okay. I realize it will take a lot of diligence and hard work to acquire a new found faith and a good grade; therefore, I am willing to put forth the effort. I will attend every class and read every assignment to get a better understanding of the Bible. More importantly, I will have a positive attitude and stay open-minded, so I will take away everything this class has to offer me, especially a newfound faith!